COWBOY JAMBOREE MAGAZINE & PRESS
  • CJ MAGAZINE
  • Style & Submit
    • About CJ
  • Hidden behind the door that sorrow locked.
    • Folks, It's Ags Connolly!
    • The Room
    • Dressing in Front of the Open Gas Oven for Warmth
    • 3 Prose Poems by Jeffrey Herman
    • The Cat in the Guest Bedroom
    • Last Call at Tully's Joint
    • Keepsake
    • The Sold Man
    • My Man Tomato Can
    • The Alternator
    • Blue Skies
    • Ain't No Dark Til Something Shines
    • Old Skip
    • Chicago Skyline
    • Uptown Lanes
    • Behind the Door
  • Books
    • I FEEL JUST LIKE A DOGWOOD TREE
    • This World Will Never Run Out of Strangers
    • Songs of the Cyberspace Cattle Drive
    • WEST OF DESTRY
    • Small Town Mastodons
    • Traveling Alone
    • All and Then None of You
    • Poachers and Pills
    • Poor Birds
    • The Lowest Basin
    • Bop City Swing
    • Nothing Good Ever Happens in a Flyover State
    • THE TICKS WILL EAT YOU WHOLE
    • Rolling on the Bottom
    • Oblivion Angels
    • The New Salvation
    • TEXAS WIND
    • Silences, Ohio
    • WHERE DARK THINGS GROW
    • San Diego Stories
    • HONKY
    • The Wild Familiar
    • KUDZU by Clem Flowers
    • IN LINE AT WALMART WITH ALL THE OTHER DAMNED
    • I CAN OUTDANCE JESUS
    • MOTEL
  • Sheldon Lee Compton
    • Ghosts by Sheldon Lee Compton
    • I AM WAR MR TOLSTOY
    • Her Little Place of Dying
    • The Caretaker
    • On SLC's Brown Bottle
    • Somebody Take Care of Little Walter
    • Oblivion Angels
    • The Orchard Is Full of Sound (excerpt)
    • Dog With a Rabbit's Head
    • By-blow
    • Until the Going Down of the River
    • The Judas Steer
    • Tooling Up
    • DYSPHORIA (excerpt)
  • Interviews, Reviews, & Presses
    • CJ Music Review South of Mars
    • CJ Music Review Matt Moran & the Palominos The Ba'ar
    • CJ Music Review WPH STILL FEELIN' THE PAYNE
    • CJ Music Review R Porter Roll with the Punches
    • Shelby Hinte's Howling Women
    • Of Fathers & Gods
    • Awakenings Review
    • Jaded by Wilson Koewing
    • Jesse Hilson's The Tattletales
    • Here in the Dark by Meagan Lucas
    • Sophomore Slump by Leigh Chadwick
    • Shadows Slow Dancing in Derelict Room
    • Anthony Koronda's Broken Bottles
    • Scott Blackburn's It Dies With You
    • Donald Ryan's Don Bronco's (Working Title) Shell
    • Jay Gertzman's The Promise of Country Noir
    • Hard Mountain Clay Review
    • Blake Johnson's Prodigal: An American Parable
  • Jobbers
    • Dead Wrestlers
    • The Night Bruiser Came to Town
    • Big Rig by Shaun Jex
    • A Night Out with Big Ricky by Katy Goforth
    • War Eagle by David Barker
    • True Dreams of Wichita by Shaun Jex
    • Doink the Clown Works Birthday Parties by Michael Chin
    • The Ballad of Ethel Bridges by David P. Barker
    • House Show in Badger County High School Gym by Simon Nagel
    • 288 Miles by David P. Barker
    • Corn Dogs by Shaun Jex
    • Getting Ready + Cowboy by Michael Chin
    • American Dream by Robert Libbey
    • Training Partner by A.A. Rubin
    • Finding the von Erichs by Shaun Jex
    • The Making of Big Sandy by Michael Carter
    • Pot Roast from Vance Godbey's by Mark A. Nobles
    • Abdullah the Butcher in Gotham by Mark A. Nobles
    • PWI by Josh Olsen
  • CJ Issues Archive
    • Oh Death!
    • Flood Waters
    • with Alacrity!
    • the Family Strain
    • All We Need of Hell-Harry Crews Tribute
    • My Dog Died-a Larry Brown inspired issue
    • Rural Enterprises
    • Grotesque to Art-in the vein of Donald Ray Pollock
    • Henry Chinaski is a Friend of Mine-the Charles Bukowski issue
    • a Mess of Catfish
    • Prine Primed-incited by John Prine
    • Asquint
    • Buried Child-inspired by Sam Shepard
    • New Fools Are Here to Take Your Place-incited by Breece D'J Pancake
    • THALIA ET ALIA-incited by Larry McMurtry
    • Country & Folk
    • Nothing's Gonna Change the Way You Feel About Me Now
    • ISSUE 9.2: the All Covers Album >
      • Sitting in the Laundromat with A Manual for Cleaning Women
      • Kentucky Folklore
      • Caught in a Trap
      • Are You Sure Merle Done It This Way?
      • Tracking
      • Playing Hooky
      • Evangelina & Hunting Bremmer's Mesa
      • Catty-Corner House
      • Blood on the Creek Bank
      • Skeeter
      • Vivian Davis, American
      • Thyroid
      • Wonderin'
      • Playing Cowboy
      • Old Dog
      • Archipelago
      • Keep YR Eye on the Moon
      • 3 Poems by Justin Carter
      • It Ain't Me
      • Heaven's Gonna Have a Honky-Tonk
    • ISSUE 10.1: A CASE OF KINK >
      • Deadhead
      • Fickster the Fixer
      • Get the Money
      • Shady Acres
      • The Ugly Death of Ferrari McGee
      • Burly Pete Calls It A Day
      • Blame It On The Blue Line
      • The Detective
      • The Tattletales (excerpt)
    • ISSUE 10.2: Tough Women, Gritty Tales >
      • "Stupid" by Rebecca Tiger
      • "Rattlesnakes" by Sabrina Hicks
      • "Destination Unknown" by Sarah Holloway
      • "Juniper" by Sarah Holloway
      • "The Stand" by Kathryn Silver-Hajo
      • "On Friday, Good Catholics Eat Fish" by Terena Elizabeth Bell
      • "Bodies in Bags" by Jamie Gallagher
      • "Sun Down" by Amy Marques
      • "Fourteen" by Megan Hanlon
      • "A Stroll" by Natalie Nee
      • "White Biped Form, 1954" by Mary Thorson
      • "Thanks for Stopping" by Tom Andes
      • "Dog Days" by Angela James
      • "26" by Pam Avoledo
      • "To The Men I've Missed" by Katy Goforth
  • Our Father's Lit: Western Pulp
“On Friday, Good Catholics Eat Fish”

by Terena Elizabeth Bell

 

When Eddie McCoy walked into Frank’s Corner Market, he did not know John was there. John was sitting at the side, by the grab n’ go potato chips, and Eddie didn’t look that way when he came in, nodding hello to the cook behind the counter instead. No, he didn’t see John, he did not see him at all. If he had, he would have turned right around and hightailed it out of there, not because he was afraid of his brother, but because he was ashamed. He was downright ashamed to face him, as he damn well should have been.
 
As to whether John saw Eddie is up for debate. To the men he was with, he said nothing about John’s entering presence, sitting with his back hunched over like it normally was, shoveling cole slaw from his plate. Fridays meant fish and the pan was a-sizzlin’ as the cook flipped several filets. “See about Mr McCoy’s order,” he told the girl who was working and, at this, John sort of looked up.
 
Now, Frank’s Corner Market was at the bottom of a hill at the end of a short gravel drive. There was only one door — it had originally been a honky tonk, built to control who went inside — and after the cook said this, the waitress went over and asked Eddie what he’d like and Eddie said one piece and three sides.
 
“That your brother over there?” one of the men sitting with John asked.
 
“Better not be,” he told him, “Show his face around me,” then sat down his fork on his plate.
 
Eddie remained in the corner where the Coca-Colas were kept, waiting for his meal, and as he did, he took his farm notebook out of his left jacket pocket, made a few notations, then put it away.
 
“You gonna say anything?” asked the man.
 
John twisted over his shoulder to look, then hunched his back again.
 
“Here you go,” the waitress told Eddie, “and I hope you don’t mind, but I’ll have to get your hushpuppies to you later. We ran out, he’s cooking more.”
 
Now what happened from here was about to be dictated by what sort of mood John was in. He might do nothing — he’d been ignoring his brother for years — or he might make sure everyone in that place knew exactly where things stood.
 
He picked up his tea and drank it, then sat down the glass.
 
“Two times under the knife,” John said, too loudly for just his table — and that’s when Eddie realized he was there.
 
It was a reference, of course, to Eddie’s sins, smoke rising off the pan, and as Eddie sat over by the Moon Pies and drink cooler, the fullness of it rolled heavy in his lungs. He shouldn’t have come, shouldn’t have left the house, but by God, sometimes a man had to show his face somewhere, be allowed to go eat in peace. He had made a mistake, yes, but time moved on and while it had done so without John in his life, Eddie had lived in the trepidation that no matter where he went, there his brother might be. He’d changed: not just stopping the drinking, but going to Walmart at midnight now, to Southern States around close — hell, he’d even changed his church. “How much,” Eddie whispered, “should one man have to repent?”
 
There had been an accident. Eddie had been driving and when it was over, a surgery after a surgery, John never stood straight again.
 
He’d have to go. He always had to go, forever in the wrong, and as Eddie looked down at his plate, he lamented the fish, battered and crispy the way he liked it.
 
“Here you go,” the waitress said — finally, his hushpuppies, and Eddie told her thank you in a real quiet voice, the politest he could muster — but he would not ask for a box.
 
“I’m not going,” he said, and she laughed, “Going where?” sixteen and already working.
 
“Anywhere,” Eddie said, “I’m not leaving this place,” and she gave him a funny look.
 
“Well, let me know if you need anything,” not sure what to say, then she went back behind the counter.
 
At this point, every man in the place knew what was going down. The cook kept on flipping — it was all he could do — and the young lady kept refilling drinks. The air got tighter and the grease popped louder and some people looked toward the door.
 
“Damn it,” Eddie yelled, “enough is enough,” and that’s when he threw down his napkin. “I’m sorry about your back,” rising out of his chair, walking towards his brother. “I’m sorry about your back,” standing over his seat, screaming in his ear. “I’m sorry about your back.”
 
His brother took a swing.
 
A punch that didn’t land, but not for want of trying: Eddie dodged out of the way. He threw back his head and stammered a step, fingers rolled tight into fists. “I’m sorry,” he said, the penitent man, with how much more to redeem.



Terena Elizabeth Bell is a fiction writer. Her debut short story collection, Tell Me What You See (Whiskey Tit), was named one of the “best books of the century (so far)” by New York Society Library. Her work has appeared in more than 100 publications, including The Atlantic, Salamander, MysteryTribune, and Ellery Queen Mystery Magazine. A Sinking Fork, Kentucky native, she lives in New York. Get one story delivered to your inbox every month by subscribing here: patreon.com/terenaelizabethbell.

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  • CJ MAGAZINE
  • Style & Submit
    • About CJ
  • Hidden behind the door that sorrow locked.
    • Folks, It's Ags Connolly!
    • The Room
    • Dressing in Front of the Open Gas Oven for Warmth
    • 3 Prose Poems by Jeffrey Herman
    • The Cat in the Guest Bedroom
    • Last Call at Tully's Joint
    • Keepsake
    • The Sold Man
    • My Man Tomato Can
    • The Alternator
    • Blue Skies
    • Ain't No Dark Til Something Shines
    • Old Skip
    • Chicago Skyline
    • Uptown Lanes
    • Behind the Door
  • Books
    • I FEEL JUST LIKE A DOGWOOD TREE
    • This World Will Never Run Out of Strangers
    • Songs of the Cyberspace Cattle Drive
    • WEST OF DESTRY
    • Small Town Mastodons
    • Traveling Alone
    • All and Then None of You
    • Poachers and Pills
    • Poor Birds
    • The Lowest Basin
    • Bop City Swing
    • Nothing Good Ever Happens in a Flyover State
    • THE TICKS WILL EAT YOU WHOLE
    • Rolling on the Bottom
    • Oblivion Angels
    • The New Salvation
    • TEXAS WIND
    • Silences, Ohio
    • WHERE DARK THINGS GROW
    • San Diego Stories
    • HONKY
    • The Wild Familiar
    • KUDZU by Clem Flowers
    • IN LINE AT WALMART WITH ALL THE OTHER DAMNED
    • I CAN OUTDANCE JESUS
    • MOTEL
  • Sheldon Lee Compton
    • Ghosts by Sheldon Lee Compton
    • I AM WAR MR TOLSTOY
    • Her Little Place of Dying
    • The Caretaker
    • On SLC's Brown Bottle
    • Somebody Take Care of Little Walter
    • Oblivion Angels
    • The Orchard Is Full of Sound (excerpt)
    • Dog With a Rabbit's Head
    • By-blow
    • Until the Going Down of the River
    • The Judas Steer
    • Tooling Up
    • DYSPHORIA (excerpt)
  • Interviews, Reviews, & Presses
    • CJ Music Review South of Mars
    • CJ Music Review Matt Moran & the Palominos The Ba'ar
    • CJ Music Review WPH STILL FEELIN' THE PAYNE
    • CJ Music Review R Porter Roll with the Punches
    • Shelby Hinte's Howling Women
    • Of Fathers & Gods
    • Awakenings Review
    • Jaded by Wilson Koewing
    • Jesse Hilson's The Tattletales
    • Here in the Dark by Meagan Lucas
    • Sophomore Slump by Leigh Chadwick
    • Shadows Slow Dancing in Derelict Room
    • Anthony Koronda's Broken Bottles
    • Scott Blackburn's It Dies With You
    • Donald Ryan's Don Bronco's (Working Title) Shell
    • Jay Gertzman's The Promise of Country Noir
    • Hard Mountain Clay Review
    • Blake Johnson's Prodigal: An American Parable
  • Jobbers
    • Dead Wrestlers
    • The Night Bruiser Came to Town
    • Big Rig by Shaun Jex
    • A Night Out with Big Ricky by Katy Goforth
    • War Eagle by David Barker
    • True Dreams of Wichita by Shaun Jex
    • Doink the Clown Works Birthday Parties by Michael Chin
    • The Ballad of Ethel Bridges by David P. Barker
    • House Show in Badger County High School Gym by Simon Nagel
    • 288 Miles by David P. Barker
    • Corn Dogs by Shaun Jex
    • Getting Ready + Cowboy by Michael Chin
    • American Dream by Robert Libbey
    • Training Partner by A.A. Rubin
    • Finding the von Erichs by Shaun Jex
    • The Making of Big Sandy by Michael Carter
    • Pot Roast from Vance Godbey's by Mark A. Nobles
    • Abdullah the Butcher in Gotham by Mark A. Nobles
    • PWI by Josh Olsen
  • CJ Issues Archive
    • Oh Death!
    • Flood Waters
    • with Alacrity!
    • the Family Strain
    • All We Need of Hell-Harry Crews Tribute
    • My Dog Died-a Larry Brown inspired issue
    • Rural Enterprises
    • Grotesque to Art-in the vein of Donald Ray Pollock
    • Henry Chinaski is a Friend of Mine-the Charles Bukowski issue
    • a Mess of Catfish
    • Prine Primed-incited by John Prine
    • Asquint
    • Buried Child-inspired by Sam Shepard
    • New Fools Are Here to Take Your Place-incited by Breece D'J Pancake
    • THALIA ET ALIA-incited by Larry McMurtry
    • Country & Folk
    • Nothing's Gonna Change the Way You Feel About Me Now
    • ISSUE 9.2: the All Covers Album >
      • Sitting in the Laundromat with A Manual for Cleaning Women
      • Kentucky Folklore
      • Caught in a Trap
      • Are You Sure Merle Done It This Way?
      • Tracking
      • Playing Hooky
      • Evangelina & Hunting Bremmer's Mesa
      • Catty-Corner House
      • Blood on the Creek Bank
      • Skeeter
      • Vivian Davis, American
      • Thyroid
      • Wonderin'
      • Playing Cowboy
      • Old Dog
      • Archipelago
      • Keep YR Eye on the Moon
      • 3 Poems by Justin Carter
      • It Ain't Me
      • Heaven's Gonna Have a Honky-Tonk
    • ISSUE 10.1: A CASE OF KINK >
      • Deadhead
      • Fickster the Fixer
      • Get the Money
      • Shady Acres
      • The Ugly Death of Ferrari McGee
      • Burly Pete Calls It A Day
      • Blame It On The Blue Line
      • The Detective
      • The Tattletales (excerpt)
    • ISSUE 10.2: Tough Women, Gritty Tales >
      • "Stupid" by Rebecca Tiger
      • "Rattlesnakes" by Sabrina Hicks
      • "Destination Unknown" by Sarah Holloway
      • "Juniper" by Sarah Holloway
      • "The Stand" by Kathryn Silver-Hajo
      • "On Friday, Good Catholics Eat Fish" by Terena Elizabeth Bell
      • "Bodies in Bags" by Jamie Gallagher
      • "Sun Down" by Amy Marques
      • "Fourteen" by Megan Hanlon
      • "A Stroll" by Natalie Nee
      • "White Biped Form, 1954" by Mary Thorson
      • "Thanks for Stopping" by Tom Andes
      • "Dog Days" by Angela James
      • "26" by Pam Avoledo
      • "To The Men I've Missed" by Katy Goforth
  • Our Father's Lit: Western Pulp