COWBOY JAMBOREE MAGAZINE & PRESS
  • CJ MAGAZINE
  • ISSUE 10.2: Tough Women, Gritty Tales
    • "Stupid" by Rebecca Tiger
    • "Rattlesnakes" by Sabrina Hicks
    • "Destination Unknown" by Sarah Holloway
    • "Juniper" by Sarah Holloway
    • "The Stand" by Kathryn Silver-Hajo
    • "On Friday, Good Catholics Eat Fish" by Terena Elizabeth Bell
    • "Bodies in Bags" by Jamie Gallagher
    • "Sun Down" by Amy Marques
    • "Fourteen" by Megan Hanlon
    • "A Stroll" by Natalie Nee
    • "White Biped Form, 1954" by Mary Thorson
    • "Thanks for Stopping" by Tom Andes
    • "Dog Days" by Angela James
    • "26" by Pam Avoledo
    • "To The Men I've Missed" by Katy Goforth
  • Style & Submit
    • About CJ
  • Books
    • Poachers and Pills
    • Poor Birds
    • The Lowest Basin
    • Nothing Good Ever Happens in a Flyover State
    • THE TICKS WILL EAT YOU WHOLE
    • Rolling on the Bottom
    • Oblivion Angels
    • The New Salvation
    • TEXAS WIND
    • Silences, Ohio
    • WHERE DARK THINGS GROW
    • San Diego Stories
    • HONKY
    • The Wild Familiar
    • KUDZU by Clem Flowers
    • IN LINE AT WALMART WITH ALL THE OTHER DAMNED
    • I CAN OUTDANCE JESUS
    • MOTEL
  • Sheldon Lee Compton
    • I AM WAR MR TOLSTOY
    • Her Little Place of Dying
    • The Caretaker
    • On SLC's Brown Bottle
    • Somebody Take Care of Little Walter
    • Oblivion Angels
    • The Orchard Is Full of Sound (excerpt)
    • Dog With a Rabbit's Head
    • By-blow
    • Until the Going Down of the River
    • The Judas Steer
    • Tooling Up
    • DYSPHORIA (excerpt)
  • Interviews, Reviews, & Presses
    • Shelby Hinte's Howling Women
    • Of Fathers & Gods
    • Awakenings Review
    • Jaded by Wilson Koewing
    • Jesse Hilson's The Tattletales
    • Here in the Dark by Meagan Lucas
    • Sophomore Slump by Leigh Chadwick
    • Shadows Slow Dancing in Derelict Room
    • Anthony Koronda's Broken Bottles
    • Scott Blackburn's It Dies With You
    • Donald Ryan's Don Bronco's (Working Title) Shell
    • Jay Gertzman's The Promise of Country Noir
    • Hard Mountain Clay Review
    • Blake Johnson's Prodigal: An American Parable
  • Jobbers
    • Dead Wrestlers
    • The Night Bruiser Came to Town
    • Big Rig by Shaun Jex
    • A Night Out with Big Ricky by Katy Goforth
    • War Eagle by David Barker
    • True Dreams of Wichita by Shaun Jex
    • Doink the Clown Works Birthday Parties by Michael Chin
    • The Ballad of Ethel Bridges by David P. Barker
    • House Show in Badger County High School Gym by Simon Nagel
    • 288 Miles by David P. Barker
    • Corn Dogs by Shaun Jex
    • Getting Ready + Cowboy by Michael Chin
    • American Dream by Robert Libbey
    • Training Partner by A.A. Rubin
    • Finding the von Erichs by Shaun Jex
    • The Making of Big Sandy by Michael Carter
    • Pot Roast from Vance Godbey's by Mark A. Nobles
    • Abdullah the Butcher in Gotham by Mark A. Nobles
    • PWI by Josh Olsen
  • CJ Issues Archive
    • Oh Death!
    • Flood Waters
    • with Alacrity!
    • the Family Strain
    • All We Need of Hell-Harry Crews Tribute
    • My Dog Died-a Larry Brown inspired issue
    • Rural Enterprises
    • Grotesque to Art-in the vein of Donald Ray Pollock
    • Henry Chinaski is a Friend of Mine-the Charles Bukowski issue
    • a Mess of Catfish
    • Prine Primed-incited by John Prine
    • Asquint
    • Buried Child-inspired by Sam Shepard
    • New Fools Are Here to Take Your Place-incited by Breece D'J Pancake
    • THALIA ET ALIA-incited by Larry McMurtry
    • Country & Folk
    • Nothing's Gonna Change the Way You Feel About Me Now
    • ISSUE 9.2: the All Covers Album >
      • Sitting in the Laundromat with A Manual for Cleaning Women
      • Kentucky Folklore
      • Caught in a Trap
      • Are You Sure Merle Done It This Way?
      • Tracking
      • Playing Hooky
      • Evangelina & Hunting Bremmer's Mesa
      • Catty-Corner House
      • Blood on the Creek Bank
      • Skeeter
      • Vivian Davis, American
      • Thyroid
      • Wonderin'
      • Playing Cowboy
      • Old Dog
      • Archipelago
      • Keep YR Eye on the Moon
      • 3 Poems by Justin Carter
      • It Ain't Me
      • Heaven's Gonna Have a Honky-Tonk
    • ISSUE 10.1: A CASE OF KINK >
      • Deadhead
      • Fickster the Fixer
      • Get the Money
      • Shady Acres
      • The Ugly Death of Ferrari McGee
      • Burly Pete Calls It A Day
      • Blame It On The Blue Line
      • The Detective
      • The Tattletales (excerpt)
  • Our Father's Lit: Western Pulp

Big Rig

BIG RIG 

Shaun Jex

I was in a motel outside of Tulsa when I heard that Luke “Big Rig” Shepard died. It had been a few months since his last in-ring appearance. I watched that match with my boys, the three of us cheering as he and Corey Rannels tore each other up and left the ring painted with blood. My oldest got so excited that he leaped off the couch and knocked over the 2-liter bottle of soda we bought. It spilled on an open box of pizza, leaving little pools of cola inside slices of pepperoni.

I don’t see the boys often. Not since Sara and I divorced and I took a trucking job. I spend most of my time on the highway. 10 hours a day. Nothing to think about except the road in front of me and the sound of the tires on the blacktop.

Watching wrestling with them is a tradition whenever I’m in town. I pick them up and we hang out at whatever motor inn I’m shacking up at. We pick up cheap junk food and spend the night in front of the TV. Shepard was their favorite wrestler. 

Sara kept the house after we split, and I didn’t bother getting another. No need. I’m never in one place that long. Shit, sometimes I just sleep in the truck. Showering in filling stations and dining on crap like beef jerky or hotdogs warmed under a heat lamp. Some folks might think that sounds like hell, but it’s not so bad. It beats holding still.

That’s one reason our marriage didn’t work. The house. Mowing the lawn on Saturday. Paying bills. Grocery shopping. Having neighbors over for dinner. It felt like being slowly strangled. After Sara got pregnant with our oldest, I decided I’d give it a shot. I made it work for a while.

 After we finished watching Luke’s last match, the boys re-enacted it over and over. They used the motel bed as their ring and took turns being Big Rig. Instead of weapons like metal chairs, they hit each other with pillows. I got to be the referee, slapping the mattress for the three count and imitating the sound of a bell at the beginning and end of each bout. In between matches, they cut promos, scowling and doing their best to talk trash.

 When I heard about Big Rig’s death, I figured I’d have to tell the boys. But when I called I could tell that they already knew. They were crying. I didn’t know what to say, so we just talked about his best matches.

Sara got back on the phone before I hung up.

“You know why he’s their favorite wrestler?” Sara said.

“Why?” I said.

“His name is Big Rig, idiot,” she said. “Think about it.”

She hung up and I sat on the edge of the bed staring at the wall. I stayed that way for a long while. I remember reading that Luke had two boys of his own. I couldn’t imagine what they were feeling. But for some reason, I suspected that my boys probably could.

I picked my phone up off the bed and searched for Big Rig’s last match. I needed to watch it again.  
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  • CJ MAGAZINE
  • ISSUE 10.2: Tough Women, Gritty Tales
    • "Stupid" by Rebecca Tiger
    • "Rattlesnakes" by Sabrina Hicks
    • "Destination Unknown" by Sarah Holloway
    • "Juniper" by Sarah Holloway
    • "The Stand" by Kathryn Silver-Hajo
    • "On Friday, Good Catholics Eat Fish" by Terena Elizabeth Bell
    • "Bodies in Bags" by Jamie Gallagher
    • "Sun Down" by Amy Marques
    • "Fourteen" by Megan Hanlon
    • "A Stroll" by Natalie Nee
    • "White Biped Form, 1954" by Mary Thorson
    • "Thanks for Stopping" by Tom Andes
    • "Dog Days" by Angela James
    • "26" by Pam Avoledo
    • "To The Men I've Missed" by Katy Goforth
  • Style & Submit
    • About CJ
  • Books
    • Poachers and Pills
    • Poor Birds
    • The Lowest Basin
    • Nothing Good Ever Happens in a Flyover State
    • THE TICKS WILL EAT YOU WHOLE
    • Rolling on the Bottom
    • Oblivion Angels
    • The New Salvation
    • TEXAS WIND
    • Silences, Ohio
    • WHERE DARK THINGS GROW
    • San Diego Stories
    • HONKY
    • The Wild Familiar
    • KUDZU by Clem Flowers
    • IN LINE AT WALMART WITH ALL THE OTHER DAMNED
    • I CAN OUTDANCE JESUS
    • MOTEL
  • Sheldon Lee Compton
    • I AM WAR MR TOLSTOY
    • Her Little Place of Dying
    • The Caretaker
    • On SLC's Brown Bottle
    • Somebody Take Care of Little Walter
    • Oblivion Angels
    • The Orchard Is Full of Sound (excerpt)
    • Dog With a Rabbit's Head
    • By-blow
    • Until the Going Down of the River
    • The Judas Steer
    • Tooling Up
    • DYSPHORIA (excerpt)
  • Interviews, Reviews, & Presses
    • Shelby Hinte's Howling Women
    • Of Fathers & Gods
    • Awakenings Review
    • Jaded by Wilson Koewing
    • Jesse Hilson's The Tattletales
    • Here in the Dark by Meagan Lucas
    • Sophomore Slump by Leigh Chadwick
    • Shadows Slow Dancing in Derelict Room
    • Anthony Koronda's Broken Bottles
    • Scott Blackburn's It Dies With You
    • Donald Ryan's Don Bronco's (Working Title) Shell
    • Jay Gertzman's The Promise of Country Noir
    • Hard Mountain Clay Review
    • Blake Johnson's Prodigal: An American Parable
  • Jobbers
    • Dead Wrestlers
    • The Night Bruiser Came to Town
    • Big Rig by Shaun Jex
    • A Night Out with Big Ricky by Katy Goforth
    • War Eagle by David Barker
    • True Dreams of Wichita by Shaun Jex
    • Doink the Clown Works Birthday Parties by Michael Chin
    • The Ballad of Ethel Bridges by David P. Barker
    • House Show in Badger County High School Gym by Simon Nagel
    • 288 Miles by David P. Barker
    • Corn Dogs by Shaun Jex
    • Getting Ready + Cowboy by Michael Chin
    • American Dream by Robert Libbey
    • Training Partner by A.A. Rubin
    • Finding the von Erichs by Shaun Jex
    • The Making of Big Sandy by Michael Carter
    • Pot Roast from Vance Godbey's by Mark A. Nobles
    • Abdullah the Butcher in Gotham by Mark A. Nobles
    • PWI by Josh Olsen
  • CJ Issues Archive
    • Oh Death!
    • Flood Waters
    • with Alacrity!
    • the Family Strain
    • All We Need of Hell-Harry Crews Tribute
    • My Dog Died-a Larry Brown inspired issue
    • Rural Enterprises
    • Grotesque to Art-in the vein of Donald Ray Pollock
    • Henry Chinaski is a Friend of Mine-the Charles Bukowski issue
    • a Mess of Catfish
    • Prine Primed-incited by John Prine
    • Asquint
    • Buried Child-inspired by Sam Shepard
    • New Fools Are Here to Take Your Place-incited by Breece D'J Pancake
    • THALIA ET ALIA-incited by Larry McMurtry
    • Country & Folk
    • Nothing's Gonna Change the Way You Feel About Me Now
    • ISSUE 9.2: the All Covers Album >
      • Sitting in the Laundromat with A Manual for Cleaning Women
      • Kentucky Folklore
      • Caught in a Trap
      • Are You Sure Merle Done It This Way?
      • Tracking
      • Playing Hooky
      • Evangelina & Hunting Bremmer's Mesa
      • Catty-Corner House
      • Blood on the Creek Bank
      • Skeeter
      • Vivian Davis, American
      • Thyroid
      • Wonderin'
      • Playing Cowboy
      • Old Dog
      • Archipelago
      • Keep YR Eye on the Moon
      • 3 Poems by Justin Carter
      • It Ain't Me
      • Heaven's Gonna Have a Honky-Tonk
    • ISSUE 10.1: A CASE OF KINK >
      • Deadhead
      • Fickster the Fixer
      • Get the Money
      • Shady Acres
      • The Ugly Death of Ferrari McGee
      • Burly Pete Calls It A Day
      • Blame It On The Blue Line
      • The Detective
      • The Tattletales (excerpt)
  • Our Father's Lit: Western Pulp